Re:life with Karmic Gacha (Modern Family)

Chapter 125: Sexy New Neighbors.

Chapter 125: Chapter 125: Sexy New Neighbors.

[Edward POV]

My aunt brought me to her rental house after scolding my dad for a while.

"There is a full room with a Queen size bed, and one with a pull out couch. Which one do you want?" She asked after we entered the new home. My dad wouldn't be joining us as his room was already finished at home.

He didn't want to change his room much after all but I still needed a place to stay far away from the dusty house in order to protect my 'asset' (Throat) so he agreed with my aunt's suggestion to let me stay with her until construction was done.

"Can I take a look first?" I asked her although I had inwardly decided to sleep in the room with the pull out bed. I couldn't inconvenience her after all. It was her house. But knowing her personality, she would badger me a lot if she found out that I had that kind of thoughts.

"Okay. I will heat up your dinner. I made Ajiaco. She said with a smile as she put her arms around my neck. Ajiaco is basically Cuban Chicken soup, and she served it with a side of rice and various dishes. It was apparent that she wanted to rectify my impression on her cooking skill after almost killing my dad and I with her fiery food before.

Then, she said whisperingly, "The landlord gave me a...Giant bed... I'm a bit afraid of sleeping on it. It's too much for me alone. So take that if you want. The bed creeps me out."

I chuckled and said, "Or, I can just join you there-"

She pinched my cheeks and said, "Don't flirt with your aunt!"

I laughed at her and went to see the bed she was telling me about as I thought she was joking. But she wasn't. It was a Wyoming size bed. If I start on one side, I could roll on it 10 times before falling over on the other.

(Wyoming size bed)

The bed alone took over ? of the entire room, and the main reason why the landlord left the thing there was because it would take too much effort for it to be moved to his new home.

"Hmm...No air conditioner. Only a ceiling fan. She will suffer in the summer." I muttered as I looked around the room while I was checking how many pillows she had on the bed – which was surprisingly no less than 20, until something else caught my attention so I went to the open window and look outside, where I saw a fluttering curtain coming from the neighbor's house.

"Hmm? Desire doesn't close her window at night? That is quite dangerous." I muttered as I tried to look inside the dim room. My eyes widened as I saw a figure of a woman sprawling on her bed, with her buttocks raised up, and her right hand holding a 'massager'...totally nude.

"WHA-" I was shocked, but my lust got the better of me, as I continued to try and peek through the fluttering curtain which obstructed my view.

"Come on curtain. Come on curtain." I chanted as I almost sat on the windowsill, trying to get a clearer view.

Then, my prayers were answered as a strong gust of wind blew, making the entire curtain lift up. I unknowingly smiled as I got a crystal clear view of the entire thing. Desiree also noticed the wind, and her eyes widened as she looked through the window.

But then, the wind suddenly stopped blowing as I quickly jumped off the windowsill and immediately closed the window before walking casually to the next room.

"I wonder if she noticed it was me." I muttered to myself, feeling no guilt at all about what I had done. "By the way, that woman sure is pent up. If there's no one to help her, then don't blame me for stepping up."

"ED! WHAT ARE YOU MUMBLING ABOUT!" Aunt Camila shouted from downstairs, wearing an apron and was looking at me weirdly.

"No-Nothing! I just think the bed is too big." I held the railings as I replied to her while discreetly covering my crotch area behind the piece of wood.

"IT Is!! ISN'T IT?! It's SO creepy! I don't need a bed that big! YOU TAKE THAT ONE!" She said, pretending to shudder as she hugged her body.

"NOO!" I shouted back while laughing at her antics before going to check the other room. The next room was a lot smaller, and there was only a green pull out couch in it. There wasn't even a desk or anything else.

I tried pulling the bed from the pull out couch but it took me a surprising amount of effort for it to even begin to give in as the couch was seemingly even older than me. Something that was made even clearer by the way it creaked as soon as I sat on it. Of course that was the very moment I knew for sure I didn't want to sleep in this room.

"Hmmmm...." I rubbed my chin as I fell into a dilemma. "Should I really try to convince Camila to sleep on the same bed together...?" I muttered.

Suddenly, I heard the sound of something hitting the bedroom window.

"What the-" I turned to the source, and at the same time, I saw a tiny, red, rubbery palm stuck to the glass.

"AHHH!" I screamed as I got startled , but then I stopped midway as I realized it was the stretchy kind of palm toy kids usually played with.

I walked to the window and opened it, only to find Abby excitedly waving at me from 4 meters away. Compared to the window to Desiree's room where I had to squint to see inside, the distance between Abby and my window was extremely close, and the houses were only parted by a hedge.

"I KNEW YOU'RE GOING TO PICK THIS ROOM!" She said excitedly while spinning the stretchy palm.

She wore a low cut white tank top and was standing there with only her underpants covering her legs, her hair was untied, and she had a moisture mask on her face, making me almost jump up for the second time.

"Seeing your face, I might just decide to bunk together with my aunt." I replied teasingly.

"Eww that's gross! Isn't that like incest or something?"

"Well Incest is Wincest."

"Maybe In Alabama."

We laughed together before she tried to convince me, "Sleep here! We're going to be so close! We can talk all night!"

"That's what I'm worried about. I wanna do some work while I'm here." I replied.

"Work work work. That's all you know." Abby scoffed mockingly. "What about my prom invitation? You're working on that yet? Or did you spend so much time with the 'Princess' that you forgot about it?" She asked sarcastically.

"Ahh..So you found out huh." I scratched my cheek as I avoided her eyes. She smacked the window sill in excitement as she angrily exclaimed, "EVERYONE FOUND OUT!!" Then, she screamed silently as her hand was in pain because of her impulsive action.

"Well...I will... at least I think... I just need to figure out a few things. Wait Abby, my aunt is calling me downstairs for dinner-"

"You didn't eat yet? It's almost 10 pm. Go eat now!" She hurriedly chased me away before saying, "When you come back, we're going to play WoW by the window."

"We have no wi-fi here yet. It's going to be set up tomorrow." I replied.

"You can use ours. I'm sure it's in range." Abby replied casually.

"Yeah...but the ping..." I mumbled whisperingly as I remembered why I still regretted telling her that I knew how to play the game. Even after all that it was still an enjoyable night for me as I got to spend some time with Abby. It wasn't anything sexual like back then but just a nice friend-type hangout.

Although I did wonder why I didn't get that uncomfortable feeling you usually get when you hang out with an ex. Was it because I had just been 'emptied' by Taylor? No, it wasn't that. It was because....

"Because I know I can't touch her huh." I muttered.

"What was that?"Abby took off one of her headphones to hear what I was saying.

"Nothing~" I yelled back at her. She looked at me weirdly and said, "Also, how the fuck are you just whip up an account, and already reached my level in just 2 hours?"

I smirked at her and said, "Don't be sad. While true that most would say it's probably cause I'm just that good but in this particular situation you might want to consider another possibility...that being that you...just suck."

"UGHH!!!" Abby rubbed her head in frustration, messing her hair at the same time.

"One more round or are we going to sleep?" I asked.

"ONE MORE ROUND OF COURSE!" She shouted excitedly before we started a new round.

After 15 minutes.

"ONE MORE ROUND!" Abby shouted.

After half an hour.

"On...One more round!" Abby said with desperation.

While we were playing, we got into a whole debate about how Shrek was actually a catch. She took the negative point of view, while I took the positive one.

"He got a house of his own, his own swamp, he takes a 'bath' everyday, so he's technically hygenic-"

"He bathes... In a swamp!" Abby retorted.

"Don't be prejudiced Abby. That's just how ogres cleans themselves." I replied. Abby tilted her head in disbelief, not understanding why a conversation about a dragon morphed into Shrek.

After an hour.

"So. You got turned on by a man's Adam apple?" I asked weirdly.

Abby was flabbergasted and she asked, "How the hell did you arrive at that conclusion? All I said is that Adam apple... contributes to how sexy a man is... Enough about me. What about you?"

"Oh. Definitely a mesh panty hose." I replied casually.

"Wait. The kind a stripper would usually wear?" Abby asked in disbelief.

"Why do you think they wear it so often? To get more tips! Hell yeah I find that to be sexy."

"You're a weird dude."

"Bite me."

After 2 hours.

"On...One more..."

"Stop. It's almost 3 am. Go to sleep." I replied to her.

" I just need one win! Just one win!" She said in a deranged manner.

I smirked and said, "Maybe tomorrow will be your lucky day, cause it's certainly not happening today. Go to sleep." But just before I could close the curtain to the room, she shouted, "WAIT!"

"What?"

"When are you...going to ask me?" She asked meekly. I stifled a laugh and said, "I said I'm still thinking about some stuff but I say you should know by Wednesday the latest. If I do decide to do it by then but I still can't figure out a good way to ask you, I guess I will just have to do it the good old way."

"Good old way?"

"You know...with the cards, reenacting the scenes from 'Love Actually'."

Abby shuddered as I said that and she hurriedly muttered, "NO! Don't do that. Not in a million years!"

"See...That's why I'm trying to figure out the best promposal for you." I replied before shutting off the curtain. I laughed as I could still hear her groaning in agony even from next room. I smiled as I flopped on the creaky pull out bed before activating my [Rest Skill] and just went to sleep.

...

Morning came surprisingly quickly after you stayed up playing games all night. It was of course ok for me since I only need only 4 hours of sleep to be well rested, thanks to my special gacha rewards but unfortunately for Abby, she didn't have the same advantages as I did. Therefore she had no choice but to play hooky today as she couldn't wake up on time.

I was eating a small amount of cereal at the dining table before my aunt got mad and asked me to wait for her to make breakfast.

"I've already made yours." I said casually.

"Huh?" She was confused, and then she saw some bruschetta neatly arranged on the kitchen counter. It was made with a baguette and some scrambled eggs mixed with basil and tomato. The bread was sprinkled with garlic butter and toasted in it before I put the eggs on it.

It was a simple breakfast that could be done in just under 10 minutes. I had also prepared some coffee for her.

"I'm the one who's supposed to be taking care of you though!" She pouted as she skeptically took a bite of the bruschetta. Then, her eyes widened as she swooned from the taste, hurriedly picking up the plate and went to sit next to me to devour the food.

"Where did you get the baguette?" She asked.

"From Phil. He went on a bread run this morning, and he called me." I replied honestly.

"Hmm..He's a nice guy." Camila said without thinking. I looked at her seriously, making her stammer, "W-what?"

"You have no chance with Phil-"

"I DIDN'T MEAN IT LIKE THAT...Wait...Really?" She asked in a surprise. After all, she was a gorgeous woman. It wouldn't take much effort for her if she decided to seduce someone's husband– not that she would ever want to do that.

I nodded and said, "Yes. He only has eyes for Claire. So give up."

I got smacked at the back of my head before my aunt asked, "Why don't you eat what you cooked?"

"I've already eaten the equivalent of 1 whole baguette. The cereal is just for dessert."

"You'll get fat." She joked

I wiped my hand with a napkin and said, "Unfortunately, there won't be a chance for me to store some excess fat in this lifetime."

Camila snorted and said, "Even your dad grew a beer gut. You have to be careful."

Well my dad didn't have a digestive system like Captain America. I smiled at my aunt and stopped perusing the topic before asking her about her time in Cuba until it was time for school.

She dropped me off near school, and even kissed my forehead in a familial way to try and make me embarrassed, but instead she was the one who ended up blushing.

"I'll pick you up-"

"No need. I'm going back with my friend." I interjected before she could finish.

"Who? Abby?" She said with some concern in her voice. "You guys could barely hang out together after the breakup. Are you sure about starting the relationship again? She won't stay here too long you know."

I shook my head in disbelief while narrowing my eyes at her. "What are you talking about? We're just hanging out as friends. Also, It's not her."

"Then? Who?"

I smirked and turned around without any reply. But before she could say anything else the bell rang, which allowed me to make a quick exit from the conversation.

"Who ED? WHOO!" She shouted from afar, but I just waved at her and pointed at my ears, gesturing that I couldn't hear her.

...

Inside the music clubroom.

"This movie sucks." Jenna muttered.

"Yeah. It really does." I interjected as I continued to teach Alex the cello from behind Jenna and the rest.

Jacob held the CD case of 'Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen' and said, "I thought it would at least be High Quality. Even the CGI is horrible in this one."

"It's because of the writer's strike... I think." Enid added while thinking hard about the matter.

I added, "Yup. That is true. The WGA strike made the production drag on, but Michael Bay still kept the release date, turning it into an under plotted, horrible, piece of shit movie."

Alex chuckled before saying, "All Transformers movies are bad. Not just this one."

"BOOOO!!!" The males in the club booed her after hearing that. Of course, there were only 2 Transformers movies at the time, but the first movie and the second one were incomparable.

"Okay Stop. Which movie should we watch next?" Elsa asked as she held two Bluray CD cases in her hands. "The Breakfast Club, or Dead Poet Society?"

"Huh." I exclaimed as I saw the choices.

"What?" Enid turned to me and asked curiously.

"Nothing. It's just...I heard about this movie before...But I had never made the effort to watch it."

"In this life, or the previous one." Was left unsaid of course.

"Well we can do it now." Elsa said, but we were then distracted by the sounds of the door opening. Abraham quickly covered the TV in case it was a teacher, but it was only Finneas and his sister, the 11 year old future Pop Star Billie Eilish.

"Hey guys!" Finneas greeted excitedly.

"BOOO!!" x5

"What did I do?" He was bewildered from the response.

I stood up and walked to him before saying, "Haha. It's nothing. We just thought you were a teacher. Hi. I'm Edward." I said with a charming smile as I shook hands with a blushing Billie. Jenna and Alex saw her reaction, and rolled their eyes as they realized she was a fan too.

"How old are you now?" I asked.

"E- Eleven. I'm starting middle school after the summer." She replied while brushing her hair behind her ears.

"Ahh 11.....Don't start watching porn...yet-"

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU EVEN SAYING!" Alex shouted from afar before I could finish my words. Billie widened her eyes in shock and looked at me in disbelief.

"What?" She muttered.

"Nothing. I'm just saying. Watching porn will destroy your perspective on love. So don't do it." I muttered under the puzzled gaze of everyone inside the room.

Jacob asked, "What the hell are you even talking about man?"

Billie nudged her brother and scolded him, "Did you tell him?! How could you!? I did it one time!"

"I didn't!" Finneas exclaimed, feeling that he had been done dirty.

Billie saw the TV that Abraham uncovered, and sighed, "You guys were watching movies during school hours?"

"Well it's not like the teacher is checking up on us." Abraham said with a smirk.

"Hey what is this? 'Requiem for a Dream'? The actress looks like Mrs Henderson." Enid said cheerily, not minding my topic of conversation with Billie at all.

I widened my eyes and went to snatch the movie from her immediately. "Hell no! We ain't watching this. Not ever."

"What- why?"

I raised the dvd up as Enid tried to snatch it back. I also used one hand to stop her from getting near me as I hid the dvd inside my shirt.

"Just trust me. Otherwise, you will have nightmares about 'Ass to Ass'." I shuddered as I remember the time my caregiver in the orphanage forced us to watch the movie before as a campaign against drug use.

I talked to Billie while the others were watching 'Bee Movie', and discussed with her about the skills she had for the band. She also sang a cover of my song, 'Grenade' with her guitar, blushing the entire time as I watched her with immense interest.

"Aight. Tomorrow. Bring some blankets and pillows. We're going to build a fort here in this classroom." Abraham said excitedly. "Ooh. And Pajamas too."

"Isn't that a little childish?" Alex rebuked him.

"We are all still children, 'Mistress'." Abraham said, earning a disgusted look from Alex and all the girls in the room.

We practiced for a few hours, and ended today's session by watching 'The Breakfast Club' movie. It was a highschool movie set in 1985, where a group of misfits had to undergo detention together, and it turned into a heart-to-heart conversation between them, and brought them together as unlikely friends.

My complaint however, was the ending.

"So, Bender was being an ass the entire time to her, borderline on sexual harassment, and Claire still falls for him? Is it because he has a sob story, or are the women in that world just... irrational?" Finneas asked in disbelief.

"I know right? And Allison– which I thought of as Enid who had fallen to the dark side..."

"Why me?" Enid interjected.

I continued, "...Lost what made her unique, and then her character was thrown into the generic 'weird kid who is actually a pretty girl' trope. She was cute even before."

"Awww...Thank you." Enid said, touched.

"He's talking about Allison. Not you!" Alex added frustratingly. "And Brian contemplating suicide from academic pressure was brushed off like a joke. Claire even manipulated him to write the homework the teacher gave them– only him alone."

"To be fair, he wrote a scathing letter to the teacher." Jacob tried to clarify, but Alex ignored him.

"Fucking Whore." Jenna muttered.

"Yeah. Claire is a whore." Alex cursed.

I faked a gasp and said dramatically, "Alex! She's your mother!"

"SHUT UP!" Alex exploded, which made the entire room laugh.

"But...the dancing at the end looked fun." Jenna muttered, which silenced the laughter, " I also want to let loose like that."

"Well you're going to need weed. And also an LP player." Elsa teased.

"If you're talking about the retro ones, there are a lot of them in the school's basement." Abraham suddenly said. We all looked at him and asked, "Really?"

"Yeah. I went there with a few of my friends before to look for treasures. But, all of them are broken though."

"Let's take a look. If it's minor damage, I can fix it." I said while standing up.

"As if." Abraham snorted, but Jacob stood up with me. "Sure. Let's do it. Abracadabra. Do your magic."

"ABRAHAM! ARHHH! Alright!" Abraham finally agreed after seeing all the people around him getting excited to move the LP player. It took us half an hour to bring the heavy LP machine to the music clubroom, and another 10 minutes for Abraham to steal some music from the broadcasting club.

"Are you sure you can fix it?" Finneas asked concernedly as he watched me opening up the interior of the machine.

"I can. But it shouldn't work for too long. The machine is too old for that." I replied. After fiddling with the wires for a while, the LP player could finally produce a sound again after 25 years.

However, as we put the LP record in it, suddenly the door of the music club room was pushed open. All of the kids froze, except for me. Mrs Herderson was standing at the door, scrutinizing each and every one of the kids, which made them feel as if they were being stared at by a predator.

"Mrs Henderson! Did you come by to check up on us? Unfortunately, we had already finished with our practice." I said casually as I walked toward the teacher.

"Why is that LP player out of the storage area Edward?" She asked in a cold tone.

"Hey you remember to call me Edward. Good for you." I said jokingly before adding, "We just need to hear some music samples. It's hard to find classical/mainstream fusion today. So we have to go back a few decades. Right, guys?"

I turned to my friends while winking at them. They noticed the hint and hurriedly said, "RIGHT!"

The bell that symbolized the end of the school day rang at this moment, which made all of us feel relieved. Mrs Henderson just raised one of her eyebrows while listening to my explanation, but she didn't feel the need to interrogate us more, so she just turned a blind eye on this slight today.

...

"Ed. Who's picking you up? You want a ride?" Jacob asked from inside his mother's car after he saw me standing at the curb in front of the school.

"Nah. My ride is just running a bit late- Wait. Here they are." I said as I looked at the tattered red jeep coming towards my direction. It stopped dangerously close to Mrs Green's car, which almost caused her to have a heart attack.

"HEYY EDWARD!" Penny got out of the car and ran towards me before giving me a hug.

"Hey Penny. Long time no see." I replied. Leonard and Sheldon also got out of the car while bickering with one another.

"She almost killed us, Leonard!"

"Nobody asked you to come. Now Shushhh! Hey Edward."

"Hey Leonard. C3PO." I said, turning to Leonard and Sheldon. Leonard and Penny laughed while Sheldon was confused.

"I don't look like C3PO. Don't get me wrong, I'm flattered. But I just can't see it." He replied robotically.

"Anyway. What's up?" Leonard changed the topic after Sheldon finished.

"Oh. I need your help."

"Sure. What is it?"