Why Did I Become the Villainess?

Chapter 181 - : Does The Villainess Deserves Happiness?

 "Purplany, I've been looking for you everywhere. What are you doing here?"

 I look back and see Rufus panting. It looks like he was running around. 

 I sigh and shake my head. "I'm just resting. Why? Did something happen?"

 It's been two days now since we started our journey back to the Illorian City. We took a day break from traveling.. So, I decided to look around the forest to rest and to think.

 Throughout the days that we're traveling, Prince Fraser constantly argues with Csille in almost everything. He often reprimanded her for every little mistake she did which resulted in Csille fighting back. There's no silence in the carriage for the whole two days. 

 I heard Rufus sigh. He then walks towards me and sits beside me. "Nothing. I was just worried something might happen to you." 

 I smile bitterly at him. Rufus was worried for me, but Prince Fraser couldn't. Although I understand why he is not worried about me. The current Prince Fraser is now influenced by the novel. So if the real Prince Fraser is annoyed at Csille, he will be annoyed at me too. 

 I didn't answer him. I just lean on the tree and close my eyes. Rufus does the same too. Silence engulfs the two of us for a couple of minutes before Rufus breaks it.

 "What's with you and Prince Fraser? Why did it looks like you hate each other? And what did he mention? Harming Sir Farren?"

 Csille scoffs. "Are you interrogating me, Prince Rufus Astalieu?" I remain my eyes close. 

 I am exhausted, not physically but mentally. I'm exhausted with all the arguments between Prince Fraser and the real Csille. Not only that, but my heart is also breaking seeing the two leads close to each other. 

 I know I shouldn't feel that way. I am the writer. I should be happy for them, but I just can't make myself happy with what is happening. I know the Prince Fraser I used to talk to before is already gone now. The more the story progresses, the more that Prince Fraser will disappear. 

 "I am not. I'm just confused. Everyone is confused. The two of you were okay before we arrived at the Saiven Kingdom, but then it changed again. Why do the two of you return to your old treatment to each other? It might look like we're not bothered, but we are. What happened, Purplany?"

 How am I supposed to answer that? Should I say that this is what Prince Fraser should be? Always mad at me and scolded me for almost everything I did. 

 "I don't know. But sometimes, knowing nothing is better than knowing everything. Also, you know your cousin, his temper is like his clothes. it changes every day."

 Rufus chuckled. "You're the only person who describes him like that. If he hears you say that. I'm sure he'll be mad at you."

 I just chuckled at him too. "Oh, isn't he always mad at me? What's new?"

 The two of us chuckled. Rufus didn't continue to pry on things between Prince Fraser and me. Instead, he told me funny stories, which made me cry until I found it hard to breathe. 

 I look at Rufus with teary eyes. I just finished laughing. I am really thankful I have a friend likes him in this world.

 "Thank you, Rufus."

 Rufus stops laughing and looks at me with a smile on his face. "Thank you for what?"

 "Thank you for always being there and for making me happy. Thank you. You don't know how much it means to me."

 Rufus just smile at me and looked up at the sky. "Because you're always with me too, Purplany, and I want you to be happy. So, please be happy. I don't want to see you sad."

 I look at Rufus and nods my head at him. I stare at the sky too. Happy? Does the villainess deserve happiness? I doubt that.

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 We're already on our fifth day passing through the forest. It's the same forest we have been through before, and just like before, we need to continue our journey for the whole two days if we still want to get out of the forest alive. 

 Csille's raises her feet and brings her knees closer to her chest. The temperature inside the forest is dropping the more we continue our journey. I can feel my jaw starting to shivers because of the coldness.

 This time, the real Csille is the one who is controlling my body again. A sweet interaction will happen between the two leads, which will make the Villainess angrier at them.

 Rufus, who is sitting beside Csille, immediately saw it. He then takes a thick blanket at the compartment at the back and covers Csille using the blanket.

 "You're shivering already. Why didn't you tell us? What if you get sick because of the cold? Purplany, are you planning to hurt yourself?" 

 Csille looks at Rufus and shakes her head. 

 Why would she tell him? Prince Fraser would definitely misunderstand her again. He'll probably say that I am only doing that because I want to be pity again. Also, I don't want that blanket. I want Prince Fraser to offer his coat for me. 

 She tried to take the blanket from her, but Rufus stopped her. "What are you doing, Csille. You'll get sick if you don't cover it around you."

 Csille is about to refute, but the carriage jolted, which startled everyone else. Csille almost falls on her seat. It's a good thing Rufus caught her arms and held her steady. 

 Csille worriedly looked in front of her and found Sir Farren leaning his head on Prince Fraser's chest. 

 It's the scene I have written. Because of the jolt, Princess Paislee is about to protect Prince Fraser from bumping his head or body to the walls of the carriage. However, when her hand slip and she ends up losing her balance.

 Everything happens so suddenly, and when she opens her eyes, she realizes that she is already on top of Prince Fraser. Her hands are on each side of Prince Fraser, trapping him on the wall while Prince Fraser is staring at Princess Paislee intently.

 Csille's eyes widen. She tried to reach her hand and pull Sir Farren away from Prince Fraser but Rufus, who is sitting beside her, immediately caught her arm. He then leans on her ears. "Don't. Let them deal with the awkwardness. If you interfere now, it will make them more embarrass, and I'm sure Prince Fraser would snap at you again."

 Csille pouts and puts down her arms. Although she really wants to pull Sir Farren away from Prince Fraser but what Rufus' said makes sense. She just waited for the two people's reaction.

 After a few minutes, Sir Farren immediately sat up straight and avoided Prince Fraser's gaze. Csille glares at Sir Farren. She can see his ears, and his cheeks are getting redder each second.

 Sir Farren clears his throat. "I'm sorry, your highness. I was just trying to protect your head, but my hand slipped. I apologize for what I did, your highness. Please punish this Knight if I did something unforgivable."

 Prince Fraser clears his throat too. But instead of saying something, he just made a 'hmm' sound and stared outside the window.

 Csille, who watched what happened from start to finish, grits her teeth and clench her fish. She is about to say something again, but Rufus pulls her again and whispered, "Not now, Csille. The two of them are still embarrassed about what happened. If you say something again, I'm sure he'll lash out at you. Remember the past few days? He often reprimanded you for doing almost everything, right?"

 Csille sigh and avoid looking at Prince Fraser and Sir Farren. She takes a deep breath to control the anger that is starting to rise inside of her. 

 Sir Farren Brichagnac! You dare to do inappropriate things towards my fiancée? I thought you already love someone else? Don't tell me the one you love is Prince Fraser? 

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 The journey inside the forest just ended, and now we are camping to take some rest before continuing our journey to the Illorian City.

 Csille can hear the laughter and gossip outside the carriage. After the cold journey inside the forest, she caught a cold, and she is currently resting to make her fever subside. She is now covered with three thick blankets

 I have written this scene. While Csille is resting inside the carriage, the two leads are with each other. Talking and enjoying each other's company.

 Since Csille had a fever, she was put on another carriage with Leander and Rufus to check her condition and confine her fever. There's a flu going on in the Saiven Kingdom before they depart, so to make sure that it's just a simple fever, the real Csille was put on another carriage.

 And because Csille will have fever their whole journey to the Illorian City and their stay in the Illorian City, Csille was barely mentioned in the novel. Does it mean I have full control over Csille's body?

 I get up and put my ears on the walls of the carriage. Trying to pick up sounds outside. As much as I want to open the window, I cannot do that. Not until they know if what I am feeling is not the flu.

 Although in the novel, I just written that Csille caught a fever and not the flu, so there's nothing to worry about. But to not worry anyone, I will just follow the rules. 

 "Hey, what do you think happened between his highness, Prince Fraser and Lady Csille? They look like they are not on good terms." I heard a woman's voice whispered.

 It's probably one of the maids. They probably notice what is happening between Prince Fraser and Csille. After all, everyone knows that Prince Fraser didn't watch Csille's matches. So, it's understandable if everyone knows what is the score between the two.

 "Hey! Don't talk so bluntly about it in broad daylight. What if someone heard you? That is inappropriate. You shouldn't talk about the people you are serving." Another maid probably said that.

 They whispered to each other again, but I couldn't hear what they were saying because their voices became faint. They probably walk away from the carriage.

 I sigh. This is what should happen. This will help Princess Paislee to catch feelings for Prince Fraser. If she notices that Prince Fraser's relationship with Csille is getting complicated as the days pass, then it will be easier for her to like Prince Fraser.

 However, my heart is hurting by the idea that everyone knows the real score between us. If this continues, then Prince Fraser and Csille will be forever impossible. 

 Am I ready for it? Am I prepared to see Prince Fraser falling in love with someone that is not me? 

 I slumped my body on the carriage floor and hugged myself. I know that this is what is supposed to happen. Prince Fraser and Princess Paislee ending up together. But my idiotic heart won't stop hoping for something else.

 I sigh. When will I ever learn? I have already heard stories from the people living in Kosmos. Can I bear to live a life like that? I already know the answer, but why can't my heart stop liking that guy? 

 He isn't gentle as Jared before. He is not what I like for a guy, but why? Why do I have feelings for that fourteen years old boy? 

 "Your highness, Prince Fraser. Aren't you going to visit Lady Csille? She still has fever until now." I heard Princess Paislee said outside the carriage.

 Your highness? It's Prince Fraser. He's outside? I move close to the door to hear their conversation however, it's been long seconds, but Prince Fraser still doesn't answer Princess Paislee.

 Is he going to ignore Princess Paislee's question? I smile bitterly. When I was moved here, he didn't even check on me once. I doubt if he would like to check on me. 

 "Why would I?" Prince Fraser asked before I heard footsteps fading away.

 I take a deep breath and laugh at myself. What am I expecting? That Prince Fraser is already influenced by the novel. The Prince Fraser I know is already gone now and will never return.