The Two Hundred and Eighty Pound Fat Girl and Her Five Husbands

Chapter 36

Chapter 36

So Lin Zaozao pushed the little brats sitting on either side of her to the back, and craned her neck to look at the robbers.

There were over ten robbers. Their clothing looked quite ordinary—neither new nor old, just ordinary. In short, these robbers were just ordinary people. They were very likely some onlookers from the crowd who saw her get fifty taels of gold.

Lin Zaozao tried hard to widen her eyes to get a good look at the faces of those dozen or so robbers. But because of the rags covering their faces, she couldn't see clearly at all.

By this time, Nan Yu's eyes had already turned icy cold. He and his martial brothers each took out weapons from their waists, protecting the ox cart.

When those dozen or so robbers carefully approached the ox cart armed with wooden staffs, Nan Yu and his brothers drew their blades, ready to fight. Just then, Lin Zaozao timely spoke up.

"Hey, hey! Wait a minute! I'd like to ask, are you all here to rob money, or to rob...something else?!"

Lin Zaozao's words made everyone halt in surprise. They couldn't have imagined her able to blurt out such a sentence at this critical moment.

"Rob money!"

The head robber replied after a brief stunned pause.

"Sorry! Of the fifty taels of gold I just got, apart from what I've spent, the rest has all been deposited at the money house. I've only got spare change on me now. So I'm afraid your dreams of robbing money will be dashed."

"But even though you can't rob money, you can still rob something else! Take a look at me. I'm the newly crowned number one beauty in my village! If you want to rob my beauty, I guarantee you it'll be a steady profit!"

As she spoke, Lin Zaozao stood right up and deliberately threw a coquettish glance at the robbers.

Her coquettish glance made the head robber falter in his steps, his eyes involuntarily twitching.

A village belle this fat?

In all his years, he had never seen a village beauty with such a huge build and ugly looks!

Perhaps seeing the disgust in the robber's eyes a little too clearly, Lin Zaozao felt somewhat unconvinced. She climbed down from the ox cart, rolled up her sleeves, and took a few steps forward. Striking what she thought was an especially alluring pose at the robbers, she said:

"What do you think? Do you see my beauty? Open your dog eyes wide and look at my voluptuous figure, my extraordinary looks!

In a radius of ten li, you definitely can't find a second one like me! What do you think? Which one of you wants to become my thirty-second concubine?

I guarantee if you follow me, I'll let you eat fragrant food and spicy dishes every day. What do you think? Tempting right?!"

As she spoke, Lin Zaozao took a few more steps forward. But with her approach, those dozen or so robbers couldn't help taking a few steps back.

Seeing the robbers retreat, Lin Zaozao hurriedly went to the robber's side, first squeezing his bicep, then smacking his bottom.

"Oh my! Not bad bod you've got there!"

As Lin Zaozao acted like a rogue, Nan Yu, who had been standing guard beside her all ready to fight, felt his mouth twitch violently. Even his hand holding the blade relaxed unconsciously.

The robber in front of Lin Zaozao also reflexively took a few more steps back, eyeing her warily.

"Why are you all retreating? I'm telling you, I'm the most beautiful village belle in my village! And now I've got money and looks. Being my little concubine would be way better than being robbers!"

As Lin Zaozao excitedly rambled on, those dozen or so robbers exchanged a glance. Eyeing the four bodyguards standing by Lin Zaozao wielding blades, and feeling they were still no match for them all together, they swiftly discarded their staffs and turned to flee without a word.

"Hey, hey! Damn it! Aren't you robbers? You didn't even rob any beauty! Why the hell are you running?"

"Various gentlemen, none of you really want to be my thirty-second little concubine?"

"Screw off, you ugly freak!"

"Get lost, you fat hag!"

"Crazy fat hag!"

"......"

The robbers cursed as they ran.

"Damn you motherf*ckers, you must be blind! With my gorgeous looks that rival flowers, you actually dare call me an ugly freak?"

"You sick bastards don't even know how to properly rob. With such a drop-dead gorgeous babe like me right in front you don't even want, no wonder you lot are just some poor losers."

The more Lin Zaozao ranted, the faster those robbers ran. In the blink of an eye, the robbers had disappeared without a trace.

"With that kind of guts and insight, still wanting to be robbers. Just a bunch of cretins without any taste, actually daring to look down on me."

Lin Zaozao grumbled as she turned to walk back. But as soon as she turned her head, she saw the escorts and Uncle Zhang with their mouths stretched from ear to ear.

Even the eyes of her two adopted little mute brothers were full of mirth.

After a brief awkward moment, Nan Yu was the first to burst into laughter. One hand holding his blade and the other slapping his thigh, he laughed so hard he could barely stand upright.

"Hahahaha......"

"Nan Yu, I'll dock your pay if you keep laughing."

"Hahahaha......"

"Nan Yu, if you dare keep laughing at me, I'll marry you and make you my sixth concubine. We'll be intimate everyday, kissing and hugging and carrying on passionately."

Instantly, you could hear a pin drop as the smile vanished from Nan Yu's face. He leapt onto his horse and said with a few coughs, "Cough cough...it's getting late, we should hurry on!"

But after trotting ahead a few steps, another wave of hysterical laughter rang out from up front.

"Little lass, the robbers have gone. Let's head back too!"

"Alright, Uncle Zhang."

As Lin Zaozao sat in the ox cart, she saw Uncle Zhang sitting in front of her, his shuddering shoulders belying his composure.

"Uncle Zhang, you're laughing at me too."

"No no, I just choked on smoke from my pipe."

Hearing his words, Lin Zaozao had to resist the urge to roll her eyes. Even his lies were half-hearted!

When did he even smoke a pipe just now?

"Uncle Zhang, am I really very ugly?"

"Not ugly at all. The little lass is very pretty."

"Then why did those damn robbers want to run away at the mention of being my thirty-second concubine?"

Uncle Zhang: "......"

Receiving no answer, Lin Zaozao didn't pursue the matter further. Oh well, it was those wretched robbers who had no taste. They hadn't seen such a kind-hearted great beauty as herself before.

With those random thoughts running through her mind, Lin Zaozao grabbed a little brat and immediately put her own big head in his lap, closing her eyes contently to sleep.

Seeing Lin Zaozao sleeping with her head pillowed on his lap, the two little brats exchanged a glance. Just as one of them was about to put his hand on Lin Zaozao's back, a pipe stem suddenly stretched out and singed him.

"Little wolf cubs, the lass is sleeping. Don't disturb her rest."

The two little brats couldn't help but shiver involuntarily under Uncle Zhang's "kind" gaze.

Was this man really just a simple ox cart driver?