The Two Hundred and Eighty Pound Fat Girl and Her Five Husbands

Chapter 108

Chapter 108

Until Ji Fantian and the others sat down at the dining table, Little Taohua was still fuming with a sour face because of Dashan's fart earlier. Lin Zaozao, on the other hand, was laughing so hard she was shaking all over.

Ji Fantian sat down next to Little Taohua and saw Lin Zaozao laughing so hard she was slapping the table, while Little Taohua had her back turned to her with a dejected look on her face.

"Zaozao, what's going on? Why are you laughing like that?"

"Fantian, let me tell you. Just now, Little Taohua..."

"Lin Zaozao, if you dare say it, I, I'll scold you eight hundred thousand times fatty."

"Hahaha..."

Hearing Little Taohua's threats, Lin Zaozao laughed even louder. She didn't stop until her stomach hurt from laughing. Sitting up straight, she smiled brightly at Little Taohua.

"Little Taohua, the food today is so delicious. This wife will reluctantly compose a poem for you to liven things up a bit."

"You can compose poetry?" Little Taohua said incredulously.

"As I said, your wife is learned in the five classics and profound in the eight arts. How could I possibly not compose a poem? My poems are extraordinary, beyond what ordinary people can compare to.

I dare say, even the great Confucian scholars of Canglan Nation could not compose poems as good as mine. You should know, the poems composed by this Daxian will become timeless classics."

"Really? Zaozao, you're not just boasting, are you!"

Still wearing yesterday's shiny green clothes, Little Xibei was fanning himself pretentiously with a fan.

"Little Xibei, it's not hot today! Aren't you cold fanning yourself like that?"

Lin Zaozao's words made Little Xibei's self-perceived elegant gestures freeze abruptly.

He put down the folding fan in his hand helplessly and said to Lin Zaozao.

"Fatty, while we're eating, why don't you demonstrate your talents and liven things up a bit."

"You might not like what I say."

Lin Zaozao said coyly.

"No matter what kind of poem you compose, we'll applaud to show our encouragement." Little Xibei said encouragingly.

"Really?"

Lin Zaozao glanced around at her expectant husbands, then ladled a bowl of soup for each of them before clearing her throat and shaking her head as she said:

"Farts are the gases of life, rolling around in the belly.

When people aren't paying attention, they sneakily slip out,

Roaming freely and arrogantly in the air.

The farter is smug, while the fartee is dejected!

This is the true meaning of farts..."

As soon as Lin Zaozao finished her "fart poem", Ji Fantian and Dizi, who were drinking soup, spewed it out simultaneously, then collapsed on the table laughing uncontrollably.

Only Little Taohua stood up, pointing at Lin Zaozao but unable to get a word out for a long time.

Just as Lin Zaozao was laughing at Little Taohua with eyes squeezed into slits, Little Taohua's next sentence made Lin Zaozao's smile freeze.

"Fatty, when I first met you, your farts were loud enough to make the ground shake, and you called yourself the Fart Daxian."

"Hmph! Fart Daxian is still better than Eat Fart Daxian. Little Taohua, remember this - the farter is smug, while the fartee can only be dejected!"

As soon as Lin Zaozao finished speaking, a loud fart came from Little Taohua.

"Holy crap! Little Taohua, how did you time that fart so perfectly? Don't tell me you used internal energy to force it out!"

Lin Zaozao's words made Little Taohua's face instantly turn bright red. Only Ji Fantian sitting next to Little Taohua silently put away the medicine in his hand.

As a divine doctor skilled in both medicine and poison, making Little Taohua embarrass himself like this was easy for him to accomplish.

Lin Zaozao pinched her nose and waved her hand grandly at everyone.

"When you hear a fart, applaud. Come on everyone, let's give Little Taohua a round of applause for that loud fart. Ugh it stinks!."

Hearing Lin Zaozao's clapping, Ye Yi and the others laughed so hard they were slapping the table.

But before Lin Zaozao could gloat, a loud fart came from her, making her face freeze instantly.

Sitting across from her, Little Taohua immediately started clapping with delight when he saw Lin Zaozao's frozen face.

And next to Little Taohua, Ji Fantian quickly retracted the medicine in his hand.

Crap, the fatty inhaled the medicine I gave to Little Taohua.

I'd better destroy the evidence right away! Thinking this, Ji Fantian flicked his wrist and the medicine on him vanished without a trace.

"What's so funny, it was just a fart! Let me tell you, my farts are more valuable than Little Taohua's!"

"How are they more valuable?" Ruo Qiu asked, holding his aching stomach from laughter.

"Mine make a 'clink' sound, worth tens of thousands in gold. Come on everyone, fork over the cash!"

Ji Fantian looked at the outstretched pudgy hand Lin Zaozao placed in front of him, and tried hard to suppress his smiling eyes as he took the small gourd from his waist and put it in her hand.

"Ji Fantian, I've seen you always stroking this little gourd like a lover. This isn't a gift from an old flame, is it?"

"Zaozao, don't talk nonsense, this was left to me by my master!"

"But if your master left it to you, why are you giving it to me?"

Having said that, Lin Zaozao handed the little gourd back to Ji Fantian.

"Zaozao, you keep it. This little gourd is a family heirloom of my clan. It was originally meant for my master to leave to my wife. Now you're my wife, so the little gourd should be yours."

"Such a nice thing, really giving it to me?"

"That's right. Zaozao, remember the white jade ginseng and lingzhi that Wuwu and Wanwan collected last time? I made them into little pills, fifteen in total. Other than the one Little Liuli took last night, the rest are all in this little gourd."

Hearing Ji Fantian's words, Lin Zaozao opened the little gourd and saw it was filled with black pills.

Wasn't it white jade ginseng? How did it turn black after being made into pills?

"Ji Fantian, do the white jade ginseng pills need to be stored in a specific box after being made?"

"With my gourd, no other box is needed."

"That's good then."

Lin Zaozao poured out the pills from the gourd and distributed them, one to each person.

Since Little Liuli had already taken one last night, giving him another would be useless, so Lin Zaozao didn't give him one.

After distributing them, there were still four pills left in the little gourd. She would give Uncle Zhang one when he returned.

After all, these little pills were good for protecting life.

"Alright, everyone keep eating. I'm off to play Doctor Lin. After all, there are still people waiting for me to save their lives!"

Lin Zaozao waved at everyone, then turned to leave.

"W-wait, Zaozao, this, for you."

Looking at what Ye Yi handed over, Lin Zaozao opened it.

"This is, silver notes?"

"Your 100,000 taels of gold."

"Wow, 100,000 taels of gold, that's a thick stack!"

Lin Zaozao took some for herself, then distributed the rest among her little husbands and brothers. Even Little Xibei and Dashan received a share from her.

"Little Liuli is clearly a wealthy man, so I won't give him any. As for the rest of you, whether you have money or not, go ahead and take this. Spend it if you need it, just remember to pay me back double later. The more the merrier, I don't mind more."

Ruo Qiu looked at the silver notes in his hand, which amounted to 5,000 taels of gold.

Back in the day, 5,000 taels of gold was only about half a month's income for him.

But ever since he was driven out by his clan, this was the first time someone had given him money unconditionally.

And this person was his wife.

Since Zaozao trusted him so much, he would use his skills to build another business empire. The connections he had accumulated over the years were not something others could seize with a mere scheme.

His wife Zaozao deserved the most precious things in the world.

Lin Zaozao bid everyone farewell, ignoring their complex looks, and pulled the rice-counting Little Liuli up from the dining table. She also conveniently grabbed him a leek box.

Lin Zaozao took a rough look at Little Liuli's current clownish make-up. Fortunately, Little Liuli was obedient and had made a mess of his delicate little face on his own.

Otherwise, if he went out dressed as a woman with that exquisite face, he'd surely get carried off by the wolfish men outside.

“Xiao Liuli, have something to eat?”

Xiao Liuli looked at the chives box Lin Zaozao had handed over, and her eyebrows unconsciously frowned slightly.

It seemed she didn't like to eat this stuff anymore.

“Xiao Liuli, you're not the Fifth Young Master anymore, just my distant younger sister Lin Zaozao. Remember, for your own sake, and for Ye Yi's, you must adapt to rural life as soon as possible.”

“Sister, I know, I will slowly change.”

Xiao Liuli took the chives box from Lin Zaozao's hand and gently took a small bite.

Seeing Xiao Liuli's refined manner of eating, Lin Zaozao really wanted to take a couple bites for her.

That chives box was so small, no more than five bites and she could finish it. But at the speed Xiao Liuli was eating, she felt that one chives box could feed him for a day.

“Xiao Liuli, you're staying here now under the name of my sister, so what about your original identity as the Fifth Young Master? If others find out the Fifth Young Master died here, they won't suspect your identity, right?”

“Xiaopang...”

“Hmm!”

Meeting Lin Zaozao's fierce gaze, Xiao Liuli was silent for a moment before slowly opening his mouth.

“Sister, I've already had Lin Lao and the guards carry a corpse similar to my build slowly back.

I was originally weak and poisoned, destined to be short-lived. Dying now in the plague, no one will be suspicious.”

“That's good then, as long as you don't bring disaster here.”

Xiao Liuli looked at the figure walking in front of him, thought for a moment, and still gently pulled Lin Zaozao's clothes, carefully asking:

“Sister, am I really so thoughtless?”

“In what way?”

“That is, when I do things, I never consider the consequences, acting on impulse...”

Lin Zaozao saw Xiao Liuli incessantly fiddling with the chives box in his hand, head lowered tensely. She was a bit speechless.

She patted Xiao Liuli's head of long black hair, re-inserting the gold hairpin that was about to fall out, and said:

“Xiao Liuli, when someone dotes on you, loves you, of course you can act impulsively. Who in this world doesn’t hope that they are the one being doted on and loved!

But Xiao Liuli, even impulsiveness should have a limit. Although I don't know your identities now, they certainly aren't simple. What your third brother is facing now is a matter of life and death, but when he left, he still shamelessly made me protect you.

Xiao Liuli, even if you can't help your third brother now, you can't make trouble for him either, understand?”

“I understand, I understand everything. I originally wanted to help my third brother, but I'm no match for them.”

“If you can't beat them now, then don't fight. When you grow up a bit, slowly get your revenge. When the time comes, don't fail to avenge this grudge and lose your own life as well.”

After patting Xiao Liuli's shoulder, Lin Zaozao turned and walked towards her old courtyard.

When she reached the door of her old courtyard, Lin Zaozao saw the people with the plague who had been waiting at her yard gate.

The numbers weren’t large anymore, it seemed the plague in Canglan Country could soon be contained.