The King's Beloved

Chapter 12 - Selena's Remorse

"I….. I don't understand," Selena thought to herself as she stared blankly outside the window. Though the view was a beautiful, clear sky, with birds flying about, it didn't faze her. She remained there inside the room, sitting on a corner, staring at the window.

""All I ever did was…..hate her," her thoughts continued.

"Yes...but…. I don't hate you. You hating me doesn't mean I should hate you back," Rania replied.

Selena's eyes widened and immediately, she looked at the direction of the voice.

And there, she saw Rania, right in front of her eyes, wearing her white dress, and smiling at her. Only this time….she was an illusion made by her mind's desperate plea.

Selena's eyes poured rivers of tears as she saw Rania. She tried to speak but her voice cracked. Her lips were dry, and her throat was sore, after all the nights she cried herself to sleep. Wetting her lips, and gulping, she was finally able to speak.

"Tell me….," she called out to Rania's illusion. "Why? Why did you save me?"

Rania simply smiled gently towards her.

"I…..All I ever did was hate you….

I don't remember any instance that I've been kind to you..or became helpful to you in any way.

Even on that day, all I did was plan to ruin you and hate you.

I hated you to the core of my being!

Humans....we….we're supposed to hate those who hates us!

But you…. You….never did.

I just don't understand….

And I guess, I never will."

Rania walked closer to her.

"Hmm… isn't it simple?" she asked her. "Do I need a reason to save a dear friend of mine?"

Selena's eyes widened again as she remembered Rania's words during that night.

"No you won't. I told the maids that I'm saving a dear friend and that they should protect her... should anything happen," Rania smiled gleefully as she said these.

Tears came flooding from her eyes once more. Biting her lips, she talked to Rania's illusion again.

"A dear friend? Since when did I become your friend?

Stop it! I don't deserve it! I don't deserve your pity….or kindness!"

Emotions came flooding through Selena's heart.

"Can't you see? You wouldn't have died if it wasn't for me?

I'M THE ONE!

I'M THE ONE WHO SHOULD HAVE DIED!

Not you….

Not….you…..

I…. I was the bad one….the evil one…..

I was the villain…. And villains always die in the end….

It should've been me…..not you….

I... I should have died instead….."

And with this, Selena wailed. She wailed so hard as if wanting the heavens to hear her cry.

"Why?! WHHHHYYYY??!!!!

She was so kind….and pure…..and honest…..and graceful…..

I didn't deserve this life...but SHE DOES!!!!

Why let me live? It was all my fault!! If only I listened to her….

If only I didn't become jealous of her….If only I wasn't greedy….

If only I….If only I didn't go there that night….

Huhuhuhuhuhuh...

I'M SORRY…..I'm so sorry Rania…. I'm really sorry...

You deserved better…. It was all my fault…..

I'm sorry.... Huhuhuhuh….

I'm sorry…...I'm sorry…."

Selena's heart shattered into pieces. She was so utterly devastated and her emotions just kept on bursting from within her. She couldn't control it. For how could she? She was just a mere teenager, who got entangled in the midst of the war between humans and Magi. She lost her whole family in the process, too, as they were trying to protect her from the enemy. Then, this…. Another person tried to protect her and caused her life to end. She felt that she was a mere burden….that, if it wasn't for her, her whole family, and even Rania, would all be alive. All those sacrifices...for who? For someone like her….a sinful, wicked girl who deserves nothing. No kindness, no grace, no love. She deserves none of it.

As Selena cried in agony, Rania lifted her hands, and caressed her cheeks as she wiped her tears.

The crying girl looked up to her.

"Selena….," she called her dearly.

"Don't cry….

Take heart and be strong….

And with all your might, strive to live and push forward".

Rania smiled once more to Selena. And like a gust of strong wind that flew by, her smile made all the clouds and storms of regret in Selena's heart.... vanish. She too, faded into thin air not long after.

A moment of silence passed by.

Knock! Knock! Knock!

The door to Selena's room sounded. Rose entered inside, together with a maid that carried a tray of food. She walked towards Selena who was still staring at the window.

"Selena, for the nth time, you have to eat," she started nagging at her. Until, she noticed something weird...or was it?

Rose didn't know if it was a trick of the light or her eyes was deceiving her, so she got closer to Selena. Once near, she lifted the hem of her skirt a bit to look at it closer. Her brows furrowed for a moment, then she asked.

"Is it just me, or your skirt's color has always been….light green?"

"Rose…," Selena called her. "Rania…..she's one foolish girl isn't she?"

Selena tilted her head and looked at Rose's direction. Now, with tears gone from her face, her eyes illuminated a beautiful, pinkish glow. Noticing this, Rose halted from her supposed-to-be rant, since she called her foolish. But she understood that at that moment, the word "foolish" was neither an insult nor a compliment to Rania.

Rose smiled and answered her, "Yeah, you got that right!"

And finally, after so many months, Selena smiled genuinely….from the bottom of her heart.

"Rose, I've decided"

"Decided what?"

"That...I won't brood over it anymore. I won't cry anymore. And that...I'll be strong and brave like Rania. I will strive with all my might, always pushing forward. I will be thankful and take care of this gift of life from her. I know, I'm not deserving for this, and I never will, but I'll do my best! I will follow her footsteps and be kind always. I will be her living legacy!"

Rose looked surprised and happy at the same time.

"Then that's good! I'm glad you're fine now. Keep it up!" she cheered her on.

"You bet I will!" Selena smirked.

"Took you look enough."

And they both laughed at each other.

Everyone was, little by little, starting to accept the loss of Rania.

Little did they know of the real events that transpired that night, when Rania got trapped in the Forbidden Chamber.

And the fact that what awaited her there was…..

None other than…..

…..a monster!

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