Reborn: The Return of the Villainous Mr. Liu

Chapter 324 It Hurts Too Much

"You are seriously not saying these things, right?" Jin asked in disdain.

"I am. I want you to believe me when I say I really didn't know that Great-grandma wanted to meet me. This is just as weird as Shui threatening you. Tell me. In those five years, did Shui ever keep bothering you into accepting her? Did she refuse to give up on you? Or let me ask you this way. Did she act towards you the way I acted obsessively with her?"

Jin stared at him in silence.

With a troubled and distraught look, Jun said, "My obsession for her was exactly what drove her away from me. That's why it's hard to think that she would do the same thing to you when she has herself...suffered from it because of me."

Jin smiled. "Love changes people, Bro. It changed you into a completely different person. So much that I couldn't even recognize you anymore. If it can happen to you, then why not Shui? Is she some Goddess? I did say to you before that I was fooling around with women to hurt her. Maybe, she really lost her screws with that. I don't care why she turned out like that, but I will never forgive her. If that's all, then I will leave."

There were still things left uncertain about Shui, so Jun didn't insist further.

When he turned, Jun quickly caught his hand and stopped him. "I..."

He wanted to apologize for all his wrongdoings, but there were so many things he had hurt him with that he couldn't find his words. He shut his eyes for a moment and recalled Jin dying in front of him.

"...I am so glad that you are okay," a tear slipped out.

Jin faced him and gave a sardonic smile. "Really now? It's hard to believe coming from you who pointed a gun at me in the past."

He froze.

"Jin..." his shivering fingers balled into a fist, and he looked into his eyes. "I didn't mean...I never meant to kill you. I really didn't. I could never kill my brother..." his eyes ached. "I know it's hard to trust me. But Jin...really...I didn't want to shoot you."

"I know. The person who let the twins break his favorite video game because he helped me with my punishment cannot possibly press the trigger and kill that same brother. You are not listening to me properly, Bro. But then again, when did you ever listen to me in the past?"

He said nothing.

"The bullet that hit my chest didn't hurt as much as your desire to erase my existence. You didn't act on that desire, but that desire in itself is what led me to let you take my life. You say you didn't mean to kill me, but then you wouldn't have brought a gun to the wedding in the first place."

Jun took a deep, suffocated breath. With a hoarse voice, he said, "You are...right. I am the worst brother anybody could have. I was selfish in the past and," he chuckled as if mocking himself, "I still am because I really want you to forgive me. Ever since I am reborn, I am only...selfishly wanting to be forgiven. One bullet made it impossible, yet here I am shamelessly standing in front of you. I know it won't mean anything to you but please let me apologize, Jin."

Jin looked blank, his eyes too tired to even cry.

Tears plopped on Jun's cheeks. "I am sorry for not believing in you. I am sorry for unjustly hating you. I am sorry for pushing you away. I am sorry for forgetting my promise to you that I will make spaghetti only for you. I am sorry if I made you feel that you were less important to me than Shui. I am sorry for turning my back on you. I am..."

His wet eyelashes trembled, "I am sorry for wanting to kill you. I am sorry for putting you through so much pain. I am sorry I couldn't be a good brother to you."

Jin inwardly bit his tongue hard, not wishing to show his weakness and tears in front of him.

Jun lowered his eyes and stared at his trembling hand. He raised it and placed it on top of Jin's head, slowly ruffling his hair. His smile to Jin was affectionate just like a loving elder brother in those times that they spent together. "I know it's impossible to forgive me. You hate me, and I deserve it. That's why if you want to see me dead, I will gladly take your bullet this time."

He froze.

Jun took a step and passed by his side. As he was about to leave, he heard a question whispered from Jin. "How did you die in the past?"

He stiffened. The question hung in the air for a while.

A forced smile formed on his lips. "I...died just naturally many years later. I lived separate and alone from everybody until I took my last breath. Quite a fitting death for me, right?"

I am sorry for lying to you, Jin, his vision blurred. I don't want to disappoint you anymore than I already have and see me as a weak man who gave up on his life like a coward.

Jun didn't want him to find him suspicious, so he quickly left.

Jin stared ahead with an empty gaze.

'Jun's car which he crashed into the building on purpose to commit suicide.'

He laughed with tears falling from his eyes. He slowly fell on his knees as he covered his face and let his tears kiss his palms.

"Aaaahhhhhh....!" He cried with an agony that tore his heart apart. "I hate you...I hate you, I hate you, I hate you! I will never...forgive you..."

His fingers dug on his temples, and the bruise which had started to heal reddened and trickled with blood again. He tiredly gazed at the night sky.

He couldn't decide what he should do and what he shouldn't. Jun had moved on and found new love in Ai.

I am the only one living in the past. Do you think I don't want to move on?

I do too, but it hurts too much, Bro. It just hurts too much...